Please don’t post THAT

This young girl from church posted a pic of her … um… derrière on Instagram and Facebook.

(I’m talking about a girl who is over 18 here, by the way. I’m not calling her mother. I know that was your first thought. )

I was surprised to see said posterior on social media for all to see, of course. I mentioned it to my own daughter GG, age 15.

She was unfazed. “All the girls post their butts on Instagram, mom,” she said. “It’s like, a thing.”

I was shocked. “You’d better not do that,” I said sternly, realizing of course that what moms say often makes no difference to teenage girls. Still, I had to make the attempt.

She rolled her eyes. “Relax. I won’t. I don’t even have one.”

“What?” I said. “You don’t have a butt? This is your assurance to me?”

“No, mom,” she said patiently. “I don’t have an Instagram. So my butt is safe.”

NO BUTTS

Those Weight-Loss Ads on Facebook

I’m getting tired of all the weight loss ads in my Facebook news feed.

Have you seen these?

“What Body Shape are you?”

Hmm… Is Jabba the Hutt one of the shapes? I don’t think you people are representing ALL the body types.

“The five vegetables that will make you gain weight.”

nickkampos.com

Okay I don’t know about other folks, but in my case it ain’t veggies causing my weight gain. Unless you count cake as a vegetable. Well, it isn’t meat, right?

“Dr. Oz…” pretty much anything.

prevention.com

I can’t stand that guy. Stop smirking at me Dr. Oz!! We know you hold us all in everlasting contempt.

“Which do you prefer?”

meme-pictures.vidzshare.net

This is another version of the “body type” idea but it’s even more annoying than the apple/pear one. Again, where is Jabba?

Now THAT’s a realistic body type…

Having it your way?

facebook

I wrote this for a Facebook status, but I didn’t include the strangest part. After the man finished getting dressed in the parking lot, he went inside TO WORK.

Yes indeed, he’d been getting his Burger King uniform on in full view of the lunch-rush drive-thru line at said restaurant.

By the way, witnessing that display did not in any way make me lose my appetite for a Whopper. With cheese.

image from 9logodesign.com